Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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