Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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