i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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