On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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