It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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