"it" just moved
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Randomize
