Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
God, I missed his penis.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
