Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
