Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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