Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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