We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
