Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
