My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
