I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
