He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
No stitches, just platelets and will power
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
