Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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