Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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