Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
