we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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