ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
