I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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