Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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