I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
You did what with his pubic hair?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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