I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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