It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
