Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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