singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
