I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
