Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
