I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Randomize
