I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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