This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
