Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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