He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
