just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
