is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
