i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
