she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
We talked him into tasing himself.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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