After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
