your room smells of hookers.
And success
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
where are my eyebrows?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
