i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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