All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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