:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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