He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
