if you like me you must not know who I am
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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