does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
