READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
