PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
