all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
