Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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