hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
