I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Randomize